Good fruit...

At a wedding last Saturday, we saw two of J's cousins that we hadn't seen in about 5 years. They are in high school now, handsome and taller than J (who is over 6 feet).

But what impressed me most about the boys was their behavior. They looked us in the eye, spoke to us and carried on conversation instead of hiding out, text messaging their friends. They joked with our children and asked to hold the baby. They didn't bat an eye (nor did they roll their eyes, nor groan) when asked to help.

When I see older teens, I always think of Drew and of how he will one day tower over me and of the type of young man I want him to become. Those goals shape my parenting philosophy.

Do I want him to be demanding? Better emphasize contentment instead choices.

Do I want him to be lazy? Better invest in work gloves instead of video games.

Do I want him to be self-focused? Better teach him to serve instead of serving him.

Much of what is recommended by today's "experts" is producing the exact opposite of what most parents want. Tonya said it best on her blog,

"If your child is chronically grumpy, unhappy, frustrated, difficult to get along with, demanding, hard to please, whiney, mean, selfish or pouty and their behavior is not improving rapidly (because you are on top of things), you need to re-think your parenting style."

I agree! The Bible says,

But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. (Galatians 5:22-23)

Has your parenting produced good fruit? Or is your fruit spoiled rotten?